


You Wish

by GoldenBeaux, karilando777



Category: Beast (Band), JJY Band | Drug Restaurant (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - After College/University, Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluffy, Light Angst, Love Bites, M/M, Mild Language, Pining, Tattoos, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-23
Updated: 2016-11-21
Packaged: 2018-06-10 03:46:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6938398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GoldenBeaux/pseuds/GoldenBeaux, https://archiveofourown.org/users/karilando777/pseuds/karilando777
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Everything is gone. For you I have nothing, absolutely nothing. But I bet you wish, I bet you wish, I bet you wish...Bet you wish that you were mine. "</p><p>Junhyung and Joonyoung have been friends for awhile. But lately it has just been....different.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TAHC](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TAHC/gifts).



> This was a prompt from my dear TAHC. This will be posted as a series of snippets. I already have three written, so I am hoping to post them fairly quickly. Summer is almost here. I can feel it! 
> 
> I'm still a new writer, and this is by far not a popular ship, but if you read, feel free to send suggestions! 
> 
> Thanks!  
> xoxox Karilando777
> 
> Ps. You can now find me on tumblr! [ karilando777](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/karilando777)

“Do you want a coffee?”

Joonyoung huffed out, talking more to the ceiling than to his friend sprawled on the floor, back against the couch by his hip. Joonyoung himself was molded into the dark leather sofa, damp skin sticking to the material rather unpleasantly. But he was too lethargic to move. It took way less energy to lay nearly motionless and complain occasionally about the heat than to actually do anything about it. 

Junhyung dropped his head back, his accounting assignment slipping off his knees and his head smacking Joonyoung’s hip bone slightly harder than he intended. He side eyed Joonyoung lazily. 

“Not really.”

Joonyoung groaned.

“I want an iced Americano.” Still talking to no one in particular. But both boys knew what his weighted statement meant. _Kid, get me an iced coffee._

Junhyung sized up Joonyoung, his ear now pressed to the warm cotton of Joonyoung’s shorts and eyes lingering slightly too long on the pearls of sweat accumulating on his upper lip. Thankfully Joonyoung had closed his eyes in exasperation, whether it was because of the heat or because Junhyung hadn’t responded as quickly as he would have liked, completly missing Junhyung ogling his sweat. Who even does that? Sweat isn't supposed to be sexy. It's gross.These weird lingering gazes were becoming more and more frequent, but fortunately for Junhyung, Joonyoung seemed rather oblivious to them. 

“Are you trying to say you want me to go out and get you coffee?” Junhyung finally asked, slightly incredulous but mostly used to Joonyoung’s superior attitude over the younger.

Joonyoung rolled over onto his side, displacing Junhyung's head rather rudely. His eyes were now open and sparkling with sometime akin to excitement, but maybe it was mischief. He always was up to no good, in Junhyung’s humble and very biased opinion.

“Would you?” God, the brat was nearly batting his damn eyelashes. Eyelashes that were too damn long.

“No.”

The whine he released was nearly enough to get Junhyung to crack a smile. Nearly. But it was the dramatic flop back onto the sticky couch that finally got him to break. 

“I won't get you a coffee, but we can go together.”

Joonyoung contemplated to the ceiling again. He seemed to be creating a silent but somehow very loud pros and cons list. The pros must have won out, because the next moment he was sitting up, long, lean legs framing Junhyung on either side, his head now uncomfortably close to Joonyoung’s groin, his bare arms sticking to Joonyoung’s exposed thighs. 

“Let's go then. I'm melting.”

So was Junhyung, but for a whole other reason. A reason that he was hoping would just go away and fast.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place the spring/summer after the first chapter.

“Jun.”

Junhyung looked up from his economics book, grunting in Joonyoung’s direction, impatient at the millionth interruption from his friend. Finals were hours away and he had a ton of work to do. They both did, but Joonyoung seemed to be the type to never study but always fucking pass. That trait was annoying alone, but when he kept Junhyung from studying for his own classes, it just irked Junhyung more. 

“What the fuck is on your shoulder?” Joonyoung had spotted a shadow earlier across the collarbone but he had ignored it, playing it off as a trick of the light, but now that Junhyung was under the bright light of his desk lamp, there was most definitely something scrolled on his friend’s clavicle, peaking out of the loose tank he wore to combat the heat of the oncoming summer.

Junhyung turned back to his textbook and shrugged. “A tattoo.” 

Joonyoung just stared at the side of Junhyung’s head. He was speechless. Junhyung, quiet, reserved, no nonsense Junhyung had a tattoo. And didn’t even tell him. Didn't even ask for input or to come with. He hadn't said anything. 

Joonyoung’s stomach swirled with a toxic mess of feelings, possessiveness and hurt and something sharp that felt something akin to arousal. His sweet gentle Junhyung had marked himself, forever. And didn’t even tell him. 

“You, but--” Joonyoung stuttered and stumbled over his words, his mind going faster than his tongue. Junhyung looked back up his eyebrows tweaked in confusion. No maybe just a silent question. At least the annoyed expression was gone. Joonyoung had always struggled to interpret Junhyung's expressions. Today was no exception.

“I mean. Uh. What does it say?” 

Junhyung's gentle smirk in reponse did nothing to calm the storm brewing in Joonyoung’s gut. Junhyung pushed away from his desk, getting to his feet with a sigh of resignation. They both knew how persistent Joonyoung could be. 

Now Junhyung was standing in between his thighs, his tank top stripped off and cast away, tattoo proudly on display, along with a very golden expanse of exposed skin. Joonyoung had seen Junhyung in various states of undress over the years, but something had changed and Joonyoung didn't know when or why, but as he allowed his eyes to memorize the dip of Junhyung's collarbone and the swirls of text over the left one, the spike of wonder and arousal was so sharp, bit his insides so deep, he had to mentally tell his other head to mind it's own damn business. 

Joonyoung had been studying English long enough to decipher the script permanently etched into his friend’s flesh. _Born again, still your son_ dipped and twirled in cursive, surrounded in pin striped swirls, and topped with a small three pointed crown.

He reached up, itching to touch the ink. It looked healed but dark enough to be still pretty fresh. He looked up, silently asking Junhyung for permission. When his gaze was met with a small nod, he finally ghosted his fingertips over the simple words. Simple words that were creating a very strong reaction in places that Joonyoung had been fighting to ignore. Fighting and losing. 

The room suddenly felt much warmer. 

“When did you do this?”

Junhyung's face remained cryptically blank. “A few weeks ago.”

Joonyoung tried to think back to what had been going on the last few weeks. Nothing seemed out of the usual. Work, class, the occasional hook up to ease the stress of work and class.

“Why?” Joonyoung felt and saw the minute shrug of his shoulders. “Okay,” he trailed off as his fingers slipped away from the tanned skin, “You could have invited me to come with. I would have held your hand or something.” He tried to make a joke out of the situation. 

“You were busy. Didn't want to trouble you.” Suddenly the room was cold, like the blast of the deep freezer from the kitchen at work.

“Oh.” Junhyung never bothered him. They saw each other almost daily. It was a bright spot in Joonyoung’s day. But now it was cloudy and muddy with those two short sentences. “Well, I wish you would have asked. I would have made the time.”

“Maybe next time.” Junhyung was already pulling away and tugging his tank top back on. 

“Yeah. Next time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the only people reading this are my friends, it really is an unheard of ship, BUT in the off chance that you are a new friend....
> 
> Thank you so much for reading :) Feel free to tell me what you think or come say hi on Tumblr!
> 
>  
> 
> [karilando777](http://karilando777.tumblr.com/)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place a few weeks after the tattoo incident.

Joonyoung was late. Junhyung was worried. 

Every Sunday, the two friends met for coffee. He hesitated to call it a date, because they were friends. Just friends. Always friends. But it had become a ritual for the two friends to meet for afternoon coffee. 

They didn't meet for coffee in the morning because Joonyoung was not a morning person at best. His job bartending on the weekends did not help with his schedule at all. Two or three in the afternoon for Joonyoung was the equivalent to nine in the morning to Junhyung.

However, it was fairly unusual for Joonyoung to be late. Even if he showed up barely conscious, he at least showed up. Bored and chewing on his lip nervously, Junhyung's eyes lingered around the coffee shop.

Joonyoung first picked out the shop because of its private label coffee which came in roasts such as the Big Titty blend, Bra-zilian Brew, and Double D Decaf and of course Joonyoung could not stop laughing at all the booby references. But it was the atmosphere that kept them coming back. The walls were a cheery yellow, the tables beat up, mismatched, and cozy. The coffee shop was built in the old linen district, so on sunny days the entire front of the store opened up with giant glass garage doors, just like this early afternoon. 

The coffee shop was bustling, every table was taken and many more people came and went as they got their drinks and pastries to go. Junhyung was quickly starting to feel like a bad samaritan, keeping a whole table to himself, looking like someone that got stood up for a brunch date. Must be bad if the girl doesn’t want to show up for something as low key as brunch right?

Junhyung turned his eyes to his phone, avoiding the glares of those hunting down a rare open table. Joonyoung was now a solid 45 minutes late, and not responding to any of the messages that had been sent while he waited. He continued to fiddle with his phone absentmindedly, opening and closing applications without purpose. 

Why was he waiting for Joonyoung? He obviously wasn’t coming. He was just concerned. Friends are allowed to be concerned. When was the last time he had heard from him? Last night before work, right? Nothing seemed wrong. He hadn’t confirmed they were meeting. Maybe he made other plans. He wasn’t obligated to be here. It was just a silent agreement. They always just met. He’s fine. He’s an adult. He’s practically a freaking giant. He can take care of himself. 

Junhyung was seriously starting to panic with each progressive thought. His mind was whirling and he realized he was clutching at his bleached hair a little too tightly when his scalp began to throb. 

Junhyung suddenly heard the scraping of the chair on the tile and looked up to tell another person that the seat was saved, but he didn’t have to. Joonyoung had finally showed up and he looked like hell.

Junhyung was speechless as he pulled out the chair and plopped down. “Hey.” Joonyoung’s normally deep voice was shredded, a deep rumbling gravel. He had a dark zip-up sweater on, the hood tugged up and a giant pair of shades shoved on, barely hanging on his nose. 

Junhyung scoffed, in utter disbelief that he had sat here for close to an hour, practically losing his mind in worry, and Joonyoung had the nerve to just sit down and say hey. Hyung be damned, he was going to let him have it.

“What the hell is your problem? I’ve been here for like an hour! Why didn’t you just say you were going to be late? Where the fuck have you been?” Junhyung hissed. He was pissed, but he didn’t want to disturb the other patrons.

Joonyoung shoved back his hood and plucked off his shades. And damn him if he didn’t make those simple movements look so damn cool. “Sorry, my phone died after work and I didn’t get a chance to charge it.”

Junhyung’s jaw dropped as he got a better look at him.

Joonyoung did not need to explain why he couldn’t juice up his phone. He was littered in hickies. They spread up his neck, across his collarbones, even his giant fucking ears looked bruised. He looked like someone had attempted to create a sunset on his flesh. Bright reds and pinks, muted purples and blues. It was a real piece of work.

And now Junhyung wasn’t just pissed. He was furious. 

He felt freezing cold and scorching heat simultaneously. His stomach was being stabbed by icicles and his face was licked with flames. He’d been a fool, sitting here hoping Joonyoung was okay, while he was busy getting laid. Was enjoying the touch, and obviously the bite, of another. Someone that wasn’t Junhyung. And it hurt. But it shouldn’t. It shouldn’t hurt and yet it did. 

Joonyoung’s hook ups were never really a secret. He worked at a bar and picked up customers and co workers alike. Well from the little Junhyung had heard, it was also the other way around. But they just had never talked about it and Joonyoung wasn’t one to flaunt it around. It was just common knowledge that he got around. And Junhyung didn’t care. 

Well he thought he didn’t care. Suddenly he cared. A lot. 

Once he realized his jaw was still hanging open, he snapped it shut so hard his teeth ached. He struggled for a few more seconds, looking for just the right words, but his brain shut down and he felt the familiar sting of salt behind his eyes. Junhyung always hated that he was an angry crier, but never as much as he did in this moment. He needed out, fast.

“Fuck you Joonyoung.” He seethed and struggled out of his chair, snatching up his belongings. As he tried to escape, Joonyoung reached out with his ridiculously long arms and tried to stop him, his nimble fingers catching at Junhyung’s wrist. But he wasn’t having it. He tugged his wrist free and booked it out of the shop as fast as his wobbly legs would carry him, ignoring the hot tears of wrath that trickled down his face.

It wasn’t until he was home and buried under his covers, effectively blocking out the universe, that he realized he wasn’t sobbing be cause he was angry. He was sad. So fucking sad. He wanted to be the one painting sunsets on Joonyoung’s skin. Joonyoung in his bed, not in some stranger’s. 

He didn’t know when it started, but somewhere in their friendship, Junhyung had developed feelings. Feelings that would never be returned. They were friends. Just friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :) This coffee shop was modeled very closely on one of my favorite coffee shops. All copyrights go to them for their hilarious coffee names. 
> 
> Feel free to come say hi on Tumblr!
> 
>  
> 
> XoXo [karilando777](http://karilando777.tumblr.com/)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fourteen days.

Junhyung was gone and Joonyoung couldn’t figure out what the hell had happened. 

After Junhyung had yelled at him and stormed out the the coffee shop, he tried to call and text but when he got silence in return, he figured that Junhyung needed space. That he’d be back. However, the hours of silence turned into days, days turned into a week, and then a second week. 

Joonyoung spent a lot of that time at home, plastered to the couch, staring blankly at the weird spot above the television. He went to work and came home. Classes were still out for summer, and he was so bored that if they were in session, he probably would have attended for once. 

He had plenty of time to think. Time to reflect and reevaluate. What the hell was he doing with his life? Why was Junhyung mad at him? He must be mad at him to not talk to him for weeks. 

They had been friends for thirteen years. No one, Joonyoung and Junhyung included, knew how they became friends. They just were one day. It was definitely a weird pairing. Joonyoung had been a rebel without a cause since his early days in secondary school. His motto was that rules were made to be broken. He never wore his uniform correctly; his shirt was never tucked and his tie was never straight. He skipped class more often than not. He started smoking in the alley and coming home piss drunk. He formed a loud garage band. He was a mess. But it came with the territory of having parents that didn’t give a fuck about him. More interested in attending lavish parties and closing business deals. Why would they have time to take care of their kid? To notice his successes. His failures.

But that wasn’t Junhyung. He played by the rules. He was quiet and prim and proper. Never a hair out of place. He was a whiz at math and the most dangerous thing he ever did in his life was sell copies of his math homework for his college fund. Well there was that one time he accidentally colored his hair the wrong color. It wasn’t his fault. The stylist was new and she mixed up the colors. Instead of a nice mocha brown, totally natural and permitted at school, it was a very light honey blond, very much not allowed at school. Joonyoung got a good laugh when Junhyung was called down to the administration for a code of conduct infraction. But Junhyung also had a family that gave a shit about what he did. His parents thought the sun rose and set on his fine ass. And he loved his parents dearly in return. As evident as the permanent branding on his collarbone.

As different as the two were, they needed each other. Junhyung was always there cleaning up Joonyoung’s messes. Smoothing things over in class, bringing his late work, tutoring him in math, letting him crash on his floor when he was too drunk to go home and had crawled through his window out of habit. And Joonyoung brought some entertainment into Junhyung’s painfully average life. None of his other friends made him laugh until he cried. Nobody else encouraged him to to try new and crazy things. Joonyoung was the adventure in Junhyung’s life. 

Joonyoung needed to fix this. Every beat of his heart was whispering a chant. Each bump bump.

_Fix it. Fix it. Fix it._

But his brain was screaming. _How?_

It was dawn on the fourteenth day when Joonyoung had had enough. 

He got out of work a little after three in the morning. Stumbling out of the back exit, the sky caught his attention, and he paused face turned to the heavens. The sky was already lightening into a pearly shade of predawn. The sun came up early this deep into the summer season, the days long and the nights short. The sun was going to make an appearance soon, but the stars and the moon were still out, shining and twinkling as brilliant as ever.

Now Joonyoung was never one to give a damn about wisps of gas millions of billions of miles away, but what made Joonyoung stop and appreciate their beauty was a memory. A memory of Junhyung and a summer night like this not so long ago.

Finals had finally wrapped up, Junhyung passing with flying colors and Joonyoung making do with passable grades. It was a time to celebrate, and Junhyung insisted they enjoy their newfound freedom by catching the first meteor shower of the summer, just like they used to do as kids. 

He had rolled his eyes at the lame suggestion, but helped drag some sleeping bags up to the roof of Junhyung’s apartment with little complaint. He also brought up a few cases of cheer beer and his favorite pack of cigarettes. He planned to be bored out of his mind, instead he couldn’t take his eyes off Junhyung’s expression of wonder and fascination at the glimmering streaks in the night sky. And they had talked about anything and everything, their tongues looser with each progressive can of piss poor beer. 

Junhyung had passed out near dawn, mostly buried in his sleeping bag to fight the chill of an early summer night. His hair was curled over his eyebrows and without thought, Joonyoung had gently coaxed the strands back. At the time he didn’t know why he did it, but now with too many days passing without seeing Junhyung’s face, he knew why. 

And it made Joonyoung’s heart ache.

Looking up at these stars, he realized his heart had been aching for days, it was dull and constant, going nearly unnoticed. Now it was so acute, so sharp, so consequential that he could barely breathe. 

He missed Junhyung. So much. So much it hurt. 

He had to fix this, and finally he had a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)  
> How did this chapter go? It wasn't as hard to write, but it is pretty angsty.
> 
> Feel free to come say hi on Tumblr! Send me prompts, tell me what you think about this, scream at me about kpop in general, whatever! I like new friends 
> 
>  
> 
> XoXo [karilando777](http://karilando777.tumblr.com/)


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This plan better work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for everyone that has been so patient. This chapter was a real struggle. There was a lot of starting and stopping over the weeks. I finally had a breakthrough today with the help of my lovely Beta, GoldenBeaux. I couldn't have wrapped this up without you! 
> 
> OK, here we go, TAHC I really really hope you enjoy this! The end is near!

Maybe this wasn’t a very good plan. Joonyoung chewed on his lip, nibbling off bits of dried skin, shifting his weight from left to right as he waited for the kid to open the damn door. 

It was still an ungodly hour, closer to six a.m., and really he would have waited longer but his skin was buzzing. He hadn’t even slept, dashing home to shower off layers of liquor and change into fresh clothes. Jittery energy shook his veins, his blood felt like an exploding soda can dropped on the sidewalk and he paced his apartment for nearly an hour before he gave up on waiting for a more appropriate time to knock on ones door. 

At least he stopped at the cafe for a God awful cup of over sweetened caffeine for Junhyung. And a couple of muffins. Caffeine and food! He was damn thoughtful. 

But maybe this was a really bad idea. 

He was starting to panic and possibly run away forever, heart ache be damned, when he heard shuffling behind the scuffed and battered apartment door. He tensed at the scraping of metal on metal from the bolt sliding free. He was uncertain how Junhyung was going to greet Joonyoung showing up out of nowhere after weeks of silence. Was he going to slam the door in his face? Yell at him? Hit him? He was betting on the door being walloped into his face.

The door opened a crack and Junhyung’s puffy, sleep crusted eye appeared in the sliver of space. Joonyoung’s heart fluttered weirdly in his too tight chest.

The eye squinted at Joonyoung, and he quickly straightened up, shoving his arms forward to present his pitiful peace offering, the bag of muffins swinging wildly and the cooling coffee splashing out of the opening a bit. He schooled his face into an expression that he hoped was endearing with a pout of regret. 

The door opened further, Junhyung leaned his hip into the wood, his hand above his head gripping the edge of the door. He remained silent, leaning his forehead on his outstretched arm. Possibly still trying to make sense of why Joonyoung was standing on his doorstep at ass’olock in the morning. Or maybe just trying to wake up enough to form words. 

Joonyoung quickly took in all that was Junhyung. His face was bloated, his long almond shaped eyes were barely visible, the creases of his pillow still pressed into his right cheek. His dark red tank top was crumpled and hanging off one shoulder and his sweatpants were rucked up one of his calves. 

He was a mess, a beautiful mess. And it made Joonyoung’s chest tighten painfully, his heart rose to sit in the hollow of his throat, pitter pattering too fast. He swallowed rapid fire to try and dislodge his vital organs back to their rightful home. All the while, Junhyung continued to lean on the door and Joonyoung’s noodle arms were starting to burn from the exertion of holding up breakfast. 

With a small huff of air, Junhyung pushed off the door with his pelvis and cocked his head for Joonyoung to enter before turning and heading inside.

Joonyoung wilted, dropping his arms and wincing behind Junhyung’s retreating figure. Everything he was expecting to happen, did not. There was no shouting or punching. Just silence. The hint of joy he felt at the door being opened was now overshadowed with fear, dark and heavy on his conscience. Over the years, the two had their fair share of disagreements, but they always battled it out with words or fists; never with this oppressive void. 

It was now or never. 

Joonyoung squared his shoulders and stepped in. 

He found Junhyung curled up on the couch, and he made grabby hands at his breakfast when Joonyoung entered the room. It was kind of adorable and he hated how it made him smile softly at the other’s sleepy form. He handed over his olive branch and took a seat on the other end of the couch, his back to the armrest and his long legs bent to accommodate the small space. 

Junhyung clutched his coffee to his face, taking a deep inhale of the aroma before sipping at the sweet concoction. He hummed appreciatively as the caffeine began to seep into his system and grabbed for a muffin. Joonyoung watched as he munched on it silently, waiting for him to wake up and possibly talk. The coffee and sugar seemed to be doing their job. Junhyung’s eyes were slightly wider, more alert. 

Halfway through breakfast, Junhyung broke the silence. “So, how was work?” 

Joonyoung cleared his throat, “Uh, same as usual.” He scratched at the back of his neck, feeling awkward. Did Junhyung not want to talk about what happened? If Joonyoung were being honest with himself, he also didn’t really want to talk about this mess. However he was curious at his reaction to their meeting at the cafe the past fortnight. 

Junhyung just hummed in response and continued to chew on his confection, occasionally slurping up the coffee in between bites. Joonyoung again found himself examining the profile of one Yong Junhyung. The curve of his nose, the pout of his lips as they cupped the plastic lid of the takeout cup, the bob of his Adam’s apple. 

He looked calm, if not still a bit drowsy. His expression was soft and relaxed, a stark contrast to the angry mask he had the last time Joonyoung saw him. Anger that Joonyoung had caused. He suddenly felt a wave of guilt at stressing out his friend. He probably should have reached out to him sooner. This was all his fault. 

Joonyoung cleared his throat again, picked at nonexistent lint on his jeans, and avoided eye contact as Junhyung cocked his head towards him. “Yeah. So look. I’m sorry. About the other day. I-” 

“Yeah. Forget about it. Let’s just drop it, okay?” Junhyung cut him off. He brushed crumbs off his lap, his gaze averted as well. 

Any other time, Joonyoung would have dropped it. He would have just pretended everything was fine. But everything wasn’t fine. Not only was Junhyung angry the last time they had seen each other, he had left crying. Joonyoung had made him cry. And over the last two weeks he could not figure out why. He could understand why he would be angry with him, but why did he cry? Why was he so hurt? He needed to know.

“No.” 

“What?” Junhyung’s head snapped back up at the harsh denial of his brush off. “No what?” 

“I’m not going to drop it.”

“Seriously Joonyoung. Stop it. Let it go.”

“I can’t.” 

Junhyung was silent again. This time, the silence was awkward and heavy, humid with tension. Joonyoung had known this was going to be painful, but he just hoped he wasn’t too late. 

“Joonie,” His voice trembled a bit, “I don’t want to fight right now. I’m just so tired.” Junhyung rested his head back against the sofa ledge, and exhaled sharply. “I don’t know what to say. There are no words you could say to take away the hurt from the past few weeks. But you’re here. And you look like you know you messed up. So just. Just drop it.” 

Joonyoung tensed at the obvious distress Junhyung was still in. His heart thundered in his ears as he tried to find the words to make this okay again.

“It’s obvious I fucked up bad. But I need to know how I fucked up? What the hell happened that day? I don’t understand. I have nothing. You were just gone. I wish you would just tell me. Please. Please Junhyungie. I’m sorry. Tell me how I can fix this.” 

“Do you remember why you were late that day Joonie?” He still wouldn’t look at Joonyoung. 

Joonyoung’s brain stumbled a little over the change of topic. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Why he was late? The past few weeks were kind of blurry haze of boredom and work. The lack of sleep today probably wasn’t helping his cognitive abilities right now. 

He finally shook his head, “Remind me. Just tell me. What happened that day?” 

Junhyung cleared his throat and started off slow, “You were so late. Later than normal for you.” 

Joonyoung nodded along, gently waving his hands for him to continue, “You weren’t answering my texts or calls. I was fucking _worried_ Joon. And you showed up, not even sorry. It was very clear that you were stumbling in after a particularly great fuck. Do you know how stupid you made me feel? How embarrassed I was sitting there, worried out of my damn mind, and you were just worried about where to put your dick.” 

Junhyung’s hesitant words quickly became accusatory and angry. The pain nearly dripping from the words as he speed up. Joonyoung was frozen for a second, soaking in the meaning of what Junhyung was trying to say. He tried to read in between the heat of his anger and pain. What was he trying to tell him? He’d never said anything about his hook ups. It didn’t really concern Junhyung. Sure they had joked a few times about his casual flings. 

Joonyoung’s brain stuttered again. Was Junhyung jealous? Of what? Of _who_? _Why?_ He was trying so hard to connect the dots of this whole mess. 

Maybe he was starting to understand. 

“Junhyung.” Joonyoung breathed out the name, with a reverence he had never had the guts to do before, that he had been holding in for a long, long time. He rocked forward, bracing his knees on the seat cushion, and reached towards the younger.

“Don’t.” He flinched away.

“Please Junhyung. Talk to me.” Joonyoung whispered.

“I wish it was me that day. That had done that.” Junhyung breathed out the short sentences so softly that he nearly missed it, but his response was immediate.

“No you don’t.” 

He scoffed, “Why?”

“Because it meant nothing with them.” 

“What the fuck does that mean?” 

“It was meaningless sex, just release. A means to an end.”

“And if it were me?”

“It would... would mean _everything._ ” 

Junhyung’s eyes widened in shock, his grip slowly choking the life out of his now half empty cup of coffee. “What? Are you fucking with me Joonyoung, ‘cause I swear-” Joonyoung shuffled down from his end of the couch in a hasty jerky rush. Needed to be closer to Junhyung as if the closer they were physically the closer Junhyung would come to understanding.

This time Junhyung didn’t flinch away. But he looked frozen in place, his wide eyes unsure, confused, almost lost. 

“I was miserable without you, it’s been absolute _hell_ Junhyung. I was like a little fawn trying to find my land legs with you gone.” There were so many more things that he wanted to say, wanted to ask, wanted to confirm, but suddenly his lips were brushing Junhyung’s and he was just as lost. Drowning in doubt and desire. Hoping and wishing that this was okay, that Junhyung really did want this too.

And then Junhyung was kissing him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I know this has a small following, but I appreciate all of you so much. Your comments have all been so sweet. 
> 
> I also noticed that my writing style has drastically changed as I was writing this whole fic, hope it is not too distracting. Somehow snippets became giant chapters of angst. 
> 
> You can always hit me up on Tumblr at [karilando777](http://karilando777.tumblr.com/) and share our feels about this pair!
> 
> Ps. My beta would like me to note she only wrote a little bit, but I still say that makes her a co author :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is this what happiness feels like?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end is finally here! Enjoy :)

Joonyoung woke up slightly disorientated, his brain swimming, his thoughts struggling to be coherent. That wasn’t altogether new. He frequently had a bad habit of drinking too much and making bad decisions. Well the decision was usually a fun one, but when he was too drunk to leave before falling asleep, it could be a pretty awkward situation. One that he avoided as much as possible. But occasionally, he didn’t have very good control of his decision making. Something that Junhyung has scolded him about on more than once. 

_Stop skipping class._

_Stop smoking._

_Stop drinking so much._

_Stop screwing around._

At the thought of Junhyung, Joonyoung eyes flew open, which ultimately made him more disorientated. But for the first time in weeks, thinking about Junhyung didn’t pull his stomach into knots and didn’t put a bad taste in his mouth. Thinking of Junhyung made him feel _warm_ and _happy_ , like a cat laying in a patch of sunshine. 

Joonyoung realized he wasn’t in his room. He was in Junhyung’s. In Junhyung’s bed. With a sleeping Junhyung, whose face was a mere inch away from his own, dozing peacefully in the late afternoon light that flooded through the window. Finally his thoughts clicked into place and his heart swelled just a little bit larger. 

He was napping with Junhyung. They were quite literally tangled together, Junhyung’s twin mattress three sizes too small for the two of them to be sharing, especially with how tall Joonyoung was. But his back was pressed against the wall, their ankles were wrapped up in a configuration that the makers of Twister would be jealous of, and their arms were thrown over each other’s waist. 

They were cuddling.

Now Joonyoung did not do napping, at least not with someone else in the bed. And he most definitely did not do cuddling. Cuddling lead to feelings. But a few hours ago, there had been talking, and feelings, and kissing. So instead of fleeing as quickly as possible, Joonyoung breathed out a sigh of contentment and relief, and pulled Junhyung closer, tucking his face against his collarbones and resting his chin on Junhyung’s head. For the first time in weeks he felt at home.

Junhyung barely stirred, only hummed under his breath and snuggled in closer, his nose nuzzling the soft skin of Joonyoung’s throat. Joonyoung absorbed everything in, the soft caress of skin on skin, the sweet and musky scent that was purely Junhyung, and the cathartic feeling of kissing Junhyung stupid just a few hours earlier.

Kissing Junhyung had been easy. Almost too easy. Shouldn't kissing someone as perfect and out of his league be more...hard? Well certain things did get hard, but were pointedly ignored by both parties. But it wasn't like a mermaid getting their legs for the first time, fumbling and awkward and embarrassing. Kissing Junhyung was easy. Like a fish to water. There was no tripping and splashing (there was a little bit of internal flailing). But kissing Junhyung had been the smooth glide of lips with a teasing peek of tongue slipping out to soothe the chapped skin of his own lips. It was like reaching out and grasping sunshine, full of molten heat and bitten back smiles. 

It had only took Joonyoung a few kisses to decide that he wanted to kiss Junhyung forever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone that helped me with this fic (My first completed chaptered fic!!) and everyone that read and enjoyed this. 
> 
> TAHC, I'm not sure how close this followed the prompt, it has been months, and I feel like I went down a bunny trail. But I hope you love reading this as much as I loved writing it (and maybe even more).
> 
> XoXoXoXoXo  
> ~K


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